Death and Mourning

 

“We give thanks for the blessing of life, of companionship ,and of memory. Though our loved one is beyond our sight, we do not despair, for we sense our beloved in our hearts as a living presence."

 

 

 

Funeral Services

When death is imminent, families and friends need comfort, support, care, and guidance, which our congregational community can provide. With the passing of a loved one, many arrangements need to be made and our staff is here to assist you. Personal rabbinic guidance and written materials are available to help families organize and prepare. At the time of death please notify the temple immediately at 414-352-9288. Funeral services, minyans, and unveilings are scheduled directly with the rabbi and the funeral home. Families may wish to use the congregation’s facility to greet fellow mourners or have a gathering place before or after a service. Please contact Abby Habush Schroeder, Director of Synagogue Relations to make these arrangements. 

Shiva

Following interment, mourners may wish to observe the period of shiva (the seven days of mourning following burial) by holding a service in which one can say Kaddish and greet those who have come to comfort the mourners. Please speak with the clergy about arranging these services.

Kaddish

Kaddish is held Monday – Thursday (5:45 - 6:00 p.m.) in the Chapel. You are welcome to join the service and to recite Kaddish for a loved one. The name of your loved one will be read at our daily minyan and during Shabbat services throughout the period of Shiva and Sh’loshim.

Unveilings

The placing of a marker on a grave is a way to honor and show care for someone we love. Jewish tradition emphasizes the importance of not visiting a gravesite for the first thirty days after burial because the pain of our loss is strongest at that time. Placing a marker may happen any time after the thirty days, but usually occurs between eleven months and one year following death. One does need to contact the stone engraving company months before the unveiling in order to allow adequate time for this part of the process. Your clergy are available for consultation regarding what to inscribe on the stone. The date will also need to be reserved with the cemetery (so that they may prepare the site). While some families request the assistance of a rabbi for the service, the service does not require rabbinic officiation. We are happy to provide you with copies of an “Unveiling Service” if you choose. Otherwise, please schedule a date with one of our clergy members.

Yahrzeit

On the anniversary of the death of your loved one, his or her name is read at services. You may also choose to light a Yahrzeit memorial candle in your home. If you are a member of Shalom and wish to receive a Yahrzeit reminder for your loved ones, please click here to email Pauline or contact her by phone at (414) 352-9288.

Yizkor

Four times a year there is a special memorial service in remembrance of all our deceased loved ones. It takes place on Yom Kippur afternoon, and on the mornings of the seventh day of the holidays of Sukkot and Pesach, and the morning of Shavuot. The Book of Remembrance is used during these services. To learn more about the Book of Remembrance, please click here. 

Memorial Plaques

Memorial plaques may be dedicated to a loved one and displayed on the memorial wall in the Kesselman Chapel. On the occasion of one’s yahrzeit, these plaques are placed in the Sanctuary. Please click here for additional information regarding purchasing a plaque in memory of a loved one.